The Importance of ReCreating Yourself
By:  Ron Luce

Our job as parents is not just to fight the culture but also to teach our kids to see through its shallowness and the motives of those who shape it. If we are going to build a strong culture in our homes for our kids and rescue them from a culture bent on deception, we have to start by recreating ourselves.

So often as parents we find ourselves doing the same things we tell our kids not to do. We comment on the amount of time our kids spend on on the internet and watching TV, but when it comes down to it it’s easier for us to watch it too. Rather than taking the time to pursue and invest in our kids sometimes we take the easier route—just watching a movie together. How were we supposed to know that the easier route would really be drawing our kids to the culture that is deceiving them rather than to us?

If your teen attends all 180 days of school, seven hours a day, they average 75,600 minutes in school, 224,640 minutes with some sort of media and a mere 2002 talking seriously with their parents in one year. The average parent spends 38.5 minutes in meaningful conversation with his or her kid each week compared to 72 hours of media per week. Who do you think will have more influence?

As leaders in the internet and movie industry Bill Gates, Steven Spielberg, and Tom Cruise have restricted their kids in the very things they have created.

Bill Gates only allows his own children 45 minutes a day on the Web. Do you think he perceives the addictive nature of entertainment on the Internet? Perhaps that is why he refuses to allow his kids to get sucked into what he made effortless for the masses to access.

Steven Spielberg and Tom Cruise will not permit their children to watch more than one hour of TV each day. What do they know about television that we don’t? They are making sure their kids don’t get sucked in and become followers culture.

We are not only apart of the culture but ignorant to it. We must make a change and it must start with us. We need to ReCreate Ourselves.

ReCreating yourself is a mindset change. So often as parents we fervently try to instill values we never possessed in our childhood. We know first hand the affects some of these bad decisions can have on people because we have experienced them. We know what these things are like and want our kids to stay as far away from them as possible. As parents we sometimes have the tendency to express our feelings of love and concern in a way that doesn’t show our heart, but rather capitalizes on what our kids did wrong. Take this story from my own life:

I can recall an instance on one of our family vacations when my girls were 13 and 14 years old, and my son was 7. We were on a cruise ship, and the girls rushed back to the room later than when they said they would be back. Even though they were only 10 minutes late, I made a big deal and was very angry about it. My anger was motivated by the fact that I was terribly alarmed. They were on a cruise ship and were supposed to be with friends; but they could have been anywhere. I was about to start a panic search all over the boat. My fear for their safety was unleashed in anger.

Afterward, I realized the damper” I had put on the vacation experience. I had not truly communicated the intentions of my heart and the reason why I had responded so angrily. I knew I was in danger of leaving them with a memory of this entire vacation as the night Papa got mad and wrecked our vacation. Dramatic action was required.

When the family got up the next day, they weren’t sure whether I would still be mad. I had gotten up earlier and met with God and felt the rebuke of the Holy Spirit in my heart, and began to ponder what I could do to make it right. Once everyone was up, I asked them to forgive me. I told them it was unnecessary to be so angry. Although what they did was wrong, my reaction was also wrong. I asked them if we could start the vacation over. They said okay. I said, “I want you to forget about last night. I’m going to walk out the door. When I come back in, I’m going to tell you what I was really feeling in my heart last night.

When I walked back in, I began to tell the girls how worried I was about them and how precious they are to me. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to them. I got on my knees and began to hug them, with tears streaming down my face, saying, “I’m so thankful that you are safe. Please don’t do that to me again!”

As parents we need to be real with our children. Our openness and vulnerability with them will set the tone for our children’s interactions with us. The battle for our kids hearts can be won and it starts with us.

This article was adapted from Ron's book, Re-Create: Building a Culture in Our Homes That Is Stronger Than the Culture Deceiving Our Kids. Look for it at your nearest bookstore, or visit www.battlecry.com for more information.

Ron Luce is the president and founder of Teen Mania Ministries, a Christian organization reaching millions of young people worldwide. He passionately declares the Gospel through Acquire the Fire TV broadcasts, youth events, camps and media resources, challenging teens to take a stand for Christ. www.teenmania.org.